Lazy self! Do you have few minutes? There is something I need to fill you in on. You may not respond because it is in your nature to just ignore someone when they face you head on. Nevertheless, I’m sure your ears will listen since you are known for actionless acts. You are like a big black box that has no motion or existence in it, yet the belief is that people can have a life in there.
This may come to you as a shock since you have been with me for the past few weeks, my uninvited guest. Needless to say that you have made yourself at home and calling the shots right under my nose as if I never existed. You made me feel like I was watching a horror movie of characters that are not known to me while giving me hopelessness hope just to keep me content. You convinced me of how tired I was that I needed a break and I fell for that, I should have known that it was you. I blame myself though because I never thought your bone still existed in my body.
I do not remember your arrival but I woke up one day and realized that my daily routine has changed and somehow I believed that it was for a better good, I even said to myself “A brother would do with more of these changes”, actually that was you convincing me in my voice. I am even ashamed that I had that thought to cross my mind. My dreams, ambitions, and goals took a step back, I can imagine them screaming at me every night when I went to sleep asking me to review them but I never did and when I wake up in the morning they would hope in the morning that I would wake up a changed man to nurture, grow, and bring them to life as I have been doing in recent times, obviously night and day the script had not changed.
The embarrassment is hard to bear, when I looked at my goals this morning I felt like I was given a fresh pair of eyes and a new heart which beats better than the one I was given before. My dreams were on a life support but I made it on time to throw them a lifeline and they started moving – a restoration is what I expected to see – my dreams; my ambitions and my goals yet again got realigned with what I have set for myself, as values to live by. I have decided to make these oblivious visits stop, you are such a destruction and you live from seeing other people assuming roles of death while they are young. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me…
The eviction notice has been issued and it is effective immediately and I do not care where you will sleep tonight. It is against our constitution to evict someone without finding them a place to stay, however, in my life, I rule and that privilege is not deserved to you or anyone who plays your game of fools. A commission of inquiry should be been chosen to investigate and deal with this matter, yet again, in my life, I convict and sentence while observing protocol, therefore, your sentence is DEATH due to time wasted which I will never get back which affected my momentum and potential achievement. You are such a bad example in society and those that hang around you should learn a lesson.
Being free from you means that I have to start cleaning up the mess that you created which I take responsibility for given the circumstances. I have learned my lesson as costly as it may be due to time not being given back, I will gentle put my tail between my legs as I do a walk of shame. Today I may be shameful of what I do but tomorrow I will rise again with a better plan and a better mentality only know to men.
Your exit please take not that my values; dreams; ambitions and goals are so important to me, they build and grow me. I am thankful, however, for the mistakes and lessons, however, restoring my journey is none of your business. Please note that I owe you nothing by the time you reach your ancestors I want you to tell them about the great man who still lives i.e. ME!
I don’t owe you – I own you and I shall do as I please.
Sincerely Yours, Hell No, Rest In Peace!
The man changing his life and facing his dreams head on!!
Written by:- Mduduzi Mthanti